I’m in a state of shock. I just went up to the garage to buy a pint of milk, as you do, and the shop assistant, a woman in her 50s, looked at me longer than is normal for your average shopping transaction scenario. I thought, she either fancies me or I’ve got a bogie/spot/misplaced hair. Then she came out with it, ‘Oooh, you look like Celine Dion’. Celine bloody Dion, that Swiss/Canadian/thinlipped, ex-Eurovision, Titanic theme tune warbling chanteuse? Thanks a bunch. Still, it’s not quite as bad as being likened to Margot Leadbetter from the Good Life which I have been, on more than one occasion. God help me!